I hate it when goats get stuck on my windshield

Posted by: tekmessa on: April 8, 2010

• In: Cameroon
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D’bongo, the village where the canoe launch is.

Yesterday we went canoeing on the Nyong river, which is the second largest in Cameroon. It took us about an hour and a half all told to get there, including the time we got stuck in a cattle traffic jam. We went down another winding dirt road, which was incredibly muddy because it had rained that morning.

cattle jam

The canoes were shallow, thin-walled affairs. The max load was 2 people + the guide. I was with Cory, and our guide was named John. I asked him about the fauna after he pointed out a water snake. In Texas, if you see a snake in the water, you’d better run–water moccasins are no joke. But he assured me that these weren’t poisonous, though there are green and yellow mambas on land. No crocodiles, either. There are frickin huge turtles and massive frogs, and in the water are viper fish and a fish called Il Capitaine.

The canoe launch

Aaron and Anna and their guide. Note Anna’s life jacket, because Filipinas can’t swim (inside joke)

The foliage was gorgeous. John pointed out the water line high, high on the trees, and said that at the height of the rainy season the water level could rise as much as 9 meters. You can row under the trees and see monkeys playing over your head.

You can see the water line on this tree. It’s where the dark wood stops.

Me getting out of the canoe

After about an hour we banked and took a hike through the forest to take a look at a 1,000 year old tree,which is protected by the ministry of forest.

the tree. I couldn’t even get anywhere near the top in the shot

Then we walked to the grotto, which is a really beautiful shelf of overhanging rock which is underwater during the rainy season. There was a wooden rack with spits for roasting fish that various fisherman used communally.

The grotto

fish roasting rack

When we got back, we had chicken and an Il Capitaine for lunch, with french fries and fried plantain. We had put in our order before we left, which means that while we were gone, they had gone fishing and caught a fish for us, and had gone to the backyard and killed two chickens. It was the best chicken I have ever had. All they did was butterfly it and roast it over a charcoal grill (and I’m talking real charcoal here, made of wood, not briquettes).

the restaurant where we ate lunch by the river

CHICKEN FTW

PLANTAINS FTW

IL CAPITAINE FTW

OMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOMNOM

There were two Cameroonian university students there, Ezekiel and Gabriel, who were doing a documentary on the river. They’d gone out in canoes after us with cameras and video recorders, and they interviewed us over lunch. They wanted to know if their tree was bigger than California sequoias. We assured them that it was, though none of us have actually ever seen a sequoia. Hey, what were we supposed to say? They’re proud of their tree. They gave us some DELICIOUS beef jerky as a thank you.

On the way home, we stopped for about 10 pounds of mangoes and the same of tomatoes, which we got for a whopping total of $5. We were merrily driving along, when a large semi truck came barreling toward us, with a GOAT tied to the windshield. A goat. A live one. It was just hanging out, nibbling from a bag of grass that was tied to the roof. I tried very hard to get a picture, but it was moving too fast.

produce stand on the side of the road

Speaking of strange things I’ve seen on the road here, today we were driving home and saw a naked man strolling along the roundabout in the middle of town. I’m talking nekkid. Not a stitch of clothing. No shoes, no pants, no shirt, not even a condom. There were three policemen hanging out watching him.

I’ve seen some pretty weird/great/amazing things here. I will be sad to leave tomorrow. But today is Anna’s birthday, and we’re throwing a party. We’re going to bust out the darts and the hookah and the rock band, and I’ve made a chocolate cake with THIN MINTS that my mom brought me from Houston. It has a cream cheese thin mint icing, and I’m making a chocolate ganache to drizzle over the top. I just had a tiny orgasm thinking about it.